Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Day Whatever

Today's task:
1. The only one. Complete your blog post for the OTHER blog you're writing for. (That was typed in a whisper, as not to hurt THIS blog's feelings).

Today's outcome:
1. Done. Read it. It's about ladies and crafting and ladies who craft. And feelings.

Friday, September 23, 2011

Frye. Day.

Today's tasks:
1. Go to Goucher. Give a kickass presentation. Pretend that libraries are important. Because they ARE!
2. Run to the mall to spend Macy's gift card.
3. Watch the season premiere of Fringe.

Today's outcomes:
1. Seriously kicked some ass. Found out that the powder rooms at Goucher are far superior to those in the Decker Library. I washed my hands again just so I could use the Dyson hand thingy for a second time.

2. Ended up in the shoe department, although I was tempted to spend my card on a pair of Not Your Daughter's Jeans. Then I remembered that I'm not a mom. And they were butt ugly jeans. And mad expensive. And I love shoes, the shoe department. I turned the corner and sitting there amongst the tacky blue glitter pumps and Grandma loafers were the most lovely pair of boots I've ever seen. Okay, maybe not. Once in Nashville, I pointed to a gorgeous pair of boots in the store window and declared that THOSE were my new boots, only to find out that they cost well over $1,000. Those boots would win first place at the County Fair. The boots at Macy's would take a very close second. I knew that the boots I was about to drool on were Frye boots and I know that Frye boots are not in my budget. I picked them up anyway. Not only did I pick them up, but I TURNED THEM OVER!!!! They were a size 8. I am a size 8. They were the last pair. They were $332.00. My mind was racing. My heart was beating. I may have jumped up and down. I'm not sure why though, because as I stated 2.5 seconds ago, I can NOT afford these boots. We're, like, trying to buy a house and shit. Sigh. These boots would look really great in our new house. Instead of putting them down, I tried them on. Instead of putting them back and going home, I told the salesman that I wasn't taking them off or leaving until they kicked me out. He laughed. I was serious. Eventually people started to stare (because I kept yelling that I couldn't afford the boots) and I took them off. I also tried on a pair of black, PLEATHER boots that PALED in comparison to the Frye lovlies. But I needed new black boots, so I bought them. But I am NOT happy about it.

3. Off to watch Pacey. He's on Fringe, you know.

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Day B

Today's tasks:
1. Run to the grocery store during lunch and pick up some much needed items. Don't let Whole Foods piss you off.
2. Respond to co-worker's email on Facebook. Don't let Facebook piss you off.
3.Spend some quality time with the pooches.
4. Get your ass in gear. Put on your really expensive sneakers that are supposed to lift your ass back to where it was when you were 20 and MOVE!
5. Make Old Man Boring dinner. He deserves it.

Today's outcomes:
1. Dear God. I ignored the woman who said "excuse me" in Spanish and "thank you" in German. I even ignored the old man who butted in line. I could not, however, ignore the overpriced clothes. $24.00 for a scarf. $28.00 for a t-shirt. $32.00 for a hat. WOW! For $84.00, I can dress my upper body. Sorry, lower half...can't afford the skirt.

2. Suck, it Zuckerberg. Practiced the new FB format by adding Old Man Boring to the "lover" list that I created. Whatever that means.
3. Working on figuring out why a face this cute likes to shove it in a kitty litter box and eat the contents.

4. Suck it, Happy Skinny Asian Bitch! I can swing my ball in the air just as high as you can!

5. Sizzle, shrimp. Sizzle!

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Day One

Today's tasks:
1. Make a badass Gin and Tonic.
2. Be better than everyone else.

Today's outcome:
1. Done.

2. Working on it.